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Baptism of Jesus: Who Will Join Me? (Horizons of the Heart 30)

Published on by Sr. Kathryn J Hermes, FSP1 Comment

The grace we are asking of God: to discover Jesus in my own personal story so that my personal myth may be transformed in Jesus, as was that of Ignatius, that I will be disposed to hear God’s call and follow it wholeheartedly

Horizons of the Heart is inspired by the Spiritual Exercises of St Ignatius and my own notes from my thirty-day Ignatian retreat in 2022. See an index for the whole series.

“It is through our senses that we feel the ‘touch’ within the heart (Exx 335), and then the heart expands in feelings of happiness, peace and serenity, and in a renewal of spiritual strength, along with desires to ‘move forward’ (Exx 315, 329) (Imitating Christ our Lord with the Senses: Sensing and Feeling in the Exercises: Antonio Guillen (The Way, 47/1-2 (Jan/April 2008), 225-241). St. Ignatius mentors retreatants in this form of prayer in his Spiritual Exercises.

Preparing for Prayer

Begin by relaxing. Take a deep breath, hold it, and then let it out with a sigh. As you do this several more times, intentionally relax the muscles in your face, your shoulders, your arms, your legs. Offer a quiet prayer of gratitude. Rest in your Father’s arms. 

Settling into Prayer

Ask Jesus that every aspect of this prayer will please him and will give glory to God.

In those days Jesus came from Nazareth of Galilee and was baptized by John in the Jordan (Mark 1:9).

Slowly read the passage for your meditation once. Leave some moments of silence and then read it again with the intention of entering into the story, of observing the details of what is happening. Take some time to set the stage and picture the environment in which the story takes place. I will share my own reflections simply as a prompt for you to enter into the contemplation more deeply yourself.

I notice as Jesus stands in line at the Jordan: just one of the crowd, talking, listening, waiting, being jostled by the large number of people around him. I enter deeply into how he is spiritually and intuitively sensing this experience, taking on his feelings as my own: his eagerness, his jubilation, his attentiveness, his childlikeness. He is simple, here and now, in the moment. His only delight is in the Father, waiting upon his Father.

Giotto Scrovegni, public domain.

“Jesus, I want to stand with you. I choose to stand in the Father’s delight.”

Let the story expand from the few verses that are recounted in Scripture to what that would have been like for Jesus or Mary, what they would have experienced or needed or felt, how they lived these events interiorly, how they expressed themselves. With your senses immerse yourself into the event. Is there any way you can be of help to them. If so, imagine yourself entering the story through these actions. Look around for a particular moment that seems to be of greater importance to you, to catch your attention.

Jesus stands in the Jordan River, the gentle waves pushing against his body as the sun shines down. Again his sense of joy, gratitude, quivering with joy, filling all things. His gratitude to the Father. There is no hurry to “get on” with the baptism. Remain with him here.

Ask for the grace “to know Jesus intimately, to love him more intensely, and so to follow him more closely.”

Entering into the Mystery

This deeper contemplation of Jesus in the Gospels is an apprenticeship of our feelings and senses in which we are formed in such a way that we feel with Jesus, that our feelings becomes those of Jesus, and our spontaneous reactions of personal promotion and self-protection are gradually curbed and re-invented so that we spontaneously react as Jesus does.

Entering into the mystery of what we contemplate, we humbly allow Jesus to be our Master, to educate our senses and feelings according to the pattern of his own life and teachings. It is a matter of becoming saturated with Jesus’ own way of being and feeling. It is learning how to resonate with everything Jesus resonates with, as we gain this felt understanding through our contemplation, and of rejecting whatever Jesus rejects.

John the Baptist approaches his cousin Jesus. Witness the moment when John, standing waist deep in the water, realizes that the Lord of All stands before him.

Two men: the Bridegroom, the Word made Flesh, and the Friend of the Bridegroom, the Best Man, the greatest of all the prophets. Two men whose every moment of life was stretched and shaped by utter fidelity to the Architect of love and our salvation. Two men who were eager to “run the race.” Two men who did as they were bidden by God and wasted no breath on what would or could lead them to deviate or dawdle along the way. Two men who sought nothing less than All.

Jesus, shape anew, bring order to the disorder in my will.

Entering still deeper into the mystery of Christ, allow your heart to taste, to smell, to touch the infinite gentleness and sweetness of Jesus. Allow your spirit to soak up what has been felt and known in this contemplative prayer.

As you do this your mind’s activity will fade into the background, and the mystery you are intuitively contemplating will begin to take over and engulf you, planting within your spirit an inner knowledge of the Lord.

You will at some point begin to intuitively sense the difference between the way Jesus spontaneously feels, speaks, and acts in a situation and the way you yourself feel, speak, and act in similar situations in your own life.

John recognized Jesus in awe. I sense Jesus feeling awe and gratitude that John had given all to prepare the Savior’s way: he did, knew, wanted nothing else.

The wise and foolish virgins: Stay away for you know not the hour when the Bridegroom will arrive.

The Father’s voice: “Behold my Son, listen to him.”

The humiliation of the Father that only a few in the history of the world would listen to his Christ. The love and humility that leaves people free.

Father, may I delight you.

Rest in that awareness as Jesus helps you to resonate with what he resonates with. As you enter into his feelings and the way he uses his senses, you will gradually lose interest in your own spontaneous reactions, defenses, and self-promotions. Jesus will bring you to his way by attraction, sweetness, and beauty. He will make you feel safety, belonging, and hope.

Image by Brigitte Werner from Pixabay

Colloquy

Allow an image or object that encapsulates all these experiences to form in your mind. Take some time to speak with God about the meaning or significance of this object.

As I prayed with Jesus at the Jordan, with how Jesus and John the Baptist were like horses, quivering to run the race, to return love for Love, to delight the Father who delighted in them, I held up my own life next to theirs and talked to them about those ways in which I was not ready to “run the race.” Not ready for Jesus to transform the myth under which I had lived my life so far.

I heard Jesus call out, “Who will join me? Who will live as I live, struggle as I struggle, give as I give, love as I love, suffer as I suffer, and triumph as I triumph?”

Ask Jesus to show you one specific gift he wishes to give you. Receive it and remain in stillness and quietly relaxed presence under the influence of the Holy Spirit.

Reviewing the Graces of Prayer

When you finish praying, write down the main gifts and discoveries from this time of intimate contemplation. What is one concrete thing you can do to solidify these gifts in your life.

Featured image: ilragazzoconmoltafede-Apostolada de la Palabra from Cathopic

Face into the headwinds of reality with courage

Published on by Sr. Kathryn J Hermes, FSP1 Comment

I have to admit that I definitely prefer the gospel passage where Jesus proclaims himself the Good Shepherd to this one read in today’s Mass which promises persecution and betrayal. The Good Shepherd who looks after his flock, keeping them safe from predators, rescuing them when they are lost, guiding them home, sleeping at the entrance to the sheepfold.

How could the same Jesus who promised me security and safety also tell me that I would be betrayed, persecuted, handed over, hated, and possibly lose my life?

For many years I pushed this passage to the back of my mind. There is certainly no bookmark in my Bible so that I could locate it quickly for meditation.  

Today’s Gospel passage is one that makes us cringe. Is what Jesus says going to happen to us? To me? Or was Jesus just talking about the Twelve?

A few short verses after this passage, Judas betrays Jesus, Jesus gives us his body and blood at the Last Supper, and he walks the road to Calvary, a condemned prisoner betrayed by one of his own followers, hated, persecuted, handed over. Then he was put to death on a cross between two thieves.

“You will be hated by all because of my name,
but not a hair on your head will be destroyed.”

While we may not be persecuted and put to death for the sake of Christ, every day comes with its own share of suffering. It is the courageous embracing of life’s struggles today that prepares us to embrace the cross in larger ways tomorrow that, yes, could even cost us our life.

The words of a therapist many years ago have stuck with me. In fact, they are the only words of his I remember: “Everything is okay. And even when they are not okay, they are still okay.” With time and the wisdom of years, I have learned that he was so right. No matter what has happened to me “not a hair on my head has been destroyed.” Yes, it is true that I have suffered loss of health, humiliation, pain, marginalization. Even as the tears cleansed and purged and healed, even as sadness ripped through my heart, I knew that somehow in God I was okay.

Jesus handed himself over to death because he was operating in the larger reality of divine and never-ending Love, and so it all had meaning. It all made sense. It was all okay. “Not a hair of his head was destroyed.”

When we pursue pleasure and fear pain, when we try to avoid death, when we are paralyzed by the idea of change that will cost us the perks and privileges of our lifestyle, the walls of human and spiritual destiny close in on us. Instead, when we face into the headwinds of reality with the courage that comes only through trust that we are indeed loved, when we choose to stand by the side of Jesus who alone is Truth, when we live by the beatitudes, when we bow before the Lord who calls us to walk the way to Calvary with him, our spirit expands and our soul is gradually overtaken by a supernatural joy beyond description.

On most days I probably would prefer to read the gospel of the Good Shepherd, but in reality, this is the gospel passage I most need to hear. To live in the world today with all its tempests and troubles one needs to be strong enough to trust in the always-greater reality of Love so that no matter what happens we can go forward knowing that “not a hair of our head will be destroyed.”

Praying with this Passage of Scripture

Lectio Divina is a way of listening to God as he speaks in his Word. It is a practice of communicating with God through Scripture and attending to God’s presence and what he wishes to tell us. In this slow and prayerful reading of the Word of God, we allow ourselves to be transformed by the Spirit who forms us into the image of Christ. There are four movements in Lectio Divina: Read (lectio), Meditate (meditation), Pray (oratio), Contemplate (contemplation).

Begin by finding a still space to pray. Breathe deeply and become quieter within. Abandon any agenda, worries or thoughts you bring to this prayer and entrust these things to the merciful care of God. Ask for the grace to be receptive to what God will speak to you through this Scripture reading. Grant me, Jesus Divine Master, to be able to know the mysteries of the kingdom of God and your unfathomable riches. Grant that your word penetrate my soul; guide my steps, and brighten my way till the day dawns and darkness dissipates, you who live and reign forever and ever Ame

Read (lectio)
Begin by slowly and meditatively reading your Scripture passage out loud. Listen for a particular word or phrase that speaks to you at this moment and sit with it for a time.

“But before all this, they will seize you and persecute you. They will hand you over to synagogues and put you in prison, and you will be brought before kings and governors, and all on account of my name. And so you will bear testimony to me. But make up your mind not to worry beforehand how you will defend yourselves. For I will give you words and wisdom that none of your adversaries will be able to resist or contradict. You will be betrayed even by parents, brothers and sisters, relatives and friends, and they will put some of you to death. Everyone will hate you because of me. But not a hair of your head will perish. Stand firm, and you will win life.

Meditate (meditatio)
Read the same passage a second time. As you re-engage the text, let the word or phrase that stood out become your invitation to speak from your heart with God who wishes to share his heart with you. Allow this word or phrase to wash over you and permeate your thoughts and feelings. You may wish to repeat this phrase quietly and gently for a period of time

Pray (oratio)
Read the text a third time. Listen for what God is saying to you. Speak heart to heart with God. Notice the feelings that this conversation with God raises up within you. Share with God what you notice about your response to this conversation. You may wish to return to repeating the phrase quietly and gently, allowing it to permeate you more and more deeply.

Contemplate (contemplatio)
Read the text a final time. Now be still and rest in God’s embrace. Ask God to give you a gift to take with you from this prayer. You might ask God if he is inviting you to do some action, for instance, make some change in your thoughts, attitudes or reactions, in the way you speak or how you treat others. Thank God for this gift and invitation as you conclude your prayer.

Image: Angie Menes via Cathopic

The Gift of Piety – I know God will take care of everything… I hope….

Published on by Sr. Kathryn J Hermes, FSP3 Comments

The sign went up one morning in the front yard of my parents’ house: For Sale. There was a finality about that moment as a young girl in a pick-up truck pounded the wooden sign into the ground and took a picture to send to the real estate agent. It was the same sign I’d seen all over our town. But now it was in front of the home my parents had been in for the past 50 years. The house was officially for sale. My parents were moving.

It seemed surreal as we prepared to support my parents as they moved from their home into a much smaller apartment. So much loss. None of us realized how much would need to be given away or thrown away in order to make the move. With every item that couldn’t go with them, a part of me died…. That part of me that had grown up there as a child, loved to listen to the birds, had run down the hallways and learned to cook in the kitchen, loved and been loved…. Connections, security, past roots…

Now with the sign hanging ominously in the front yard, the unknown was closer and the leap into the future imminent. A lot of fear flowed through our family in those final days…. My siblings wanted the best. We tried to do the best thing for them.

I often say that I have infinite trust in divine Providence…but when it is your own parents’ happiness at stake it suddenly seems a flimsy hope. If I could just be sure. If I could control the outcome. If I could know the future…. But we can’t. We have to do our best. The best we can with what we have at the moment. Then it sometimes feels we have nothing left but to hope against hope that it all works out.

The Holy Spirit moves within our souls at times such as this, activating in us the gift of piety. The gift of piety is a supernatural habit infused in our souls in Baptism. When this gift within us is weak, we try to convince ourselves that God is good, to believe that God will take care of us. But under the influence of the gift of piety, we change our outlook completely. Jordan Aumann in his book Spiritual Theology states: “For those who are governed by the gift of piety, the world and all creation are considered as the house of the Father, and everything in the universe becomes a testimony of his infinite goodness. Such persons are able to discover the religious meaning hidden in all things.”

It is the gift of piety that surprises us with an affection for God as our beloved Father and an absolute child-like love. As we go through the situations of our life that could make us tremble, we walk instead with a filial confidence in the heavenly Father from whom all things come. Aumann states: “Intimately penetrated with the sentiment of its adoptive divine filiation, the soul abandons itself calmly and confidently to the heavenly Father. it is not preoccupied with any care, and nothing is capable of disturbing its unalterable peace, even for an instant. The soul asks nothing and rejects nothing. It is not concerned about health or sickness, a long life or a short life, consolations or aridity, persecution or praise, activity or idleness. It is completely submissive to the will of God and seeks only to glorify God with all its powers…. These souls run to God as a child runs to its Father.”

Here are two ways you can dispose yourself for the activity of the Holy Spirit related to the gift of piety:

1) Consider all things, even material things, as belonging to the house of God. St Francis of Assisi, for example, saw and judged all things in this visible world as belonging in some way to the heavenly Father. The created universe and everything about our lives is truly the Father’s domain. All things belong to him. By treating all things and every situation as somehow belonging also to God, we grow in union, respect and reverence for the Almighty and tender Father.

2) Practice daily a spirit of surrender and trust in God. We can try to do what we can, as I did as I faced the losses connected with my parents’ move. Even though our trust in God won’t be perfect until the gift of piety is intensely activated in us, the practice of striving for an evenness of spirit because we know for certain that God loves us as a father and cares for us in our daily needs will dispose us for the action of the Holy Spirit’s power.

A Prayer

O Holy Spirit, create in me the heart of a child toward its heavenly Father, a heart that seeks him always, loving and serving him with good will. Create in me a heart to my brothers and sisters that is kind, gentle, and meek with all. Amen.

 

How we need our Mother today!

Published on by Sr. Kathryn J Hermes, FSPLeave a comment

August… the month we traditionally think of heaven.

August, 2020.

Hmm. This year, I sometimes find myself wishing I could escape to heaven, at least in my imagination. It’s on a lot of people’s minds. Some of them wonder why “heaven” doesn’t do something about what’s been happening on earth this year. And between the Marian feasts of the Assumption (August 15) and the Queenship of Mary (August 22), the “vision” of heaven, though beautiful, seems remote from the struggles breaking our lives and hearts apart as the summer winds to a close.

The lyrics to my favorite hymn for the Feast of the Assumption paint a lovely picture of Mary in the blessed joy and glory of heaven: Who is she ascends so far / next the heavenly King? / Round about whom angels fly / and her praises sing.

The loving, living, giving, and suffering of her earthly life over, Mary now reigns in heaven as Queen of heaven and earth. It could almost seem a kind of well-earned eternal retirement, or a victory march, when she took her place in her coronation at the right hand of her Son. As though she lives now in some inaccessible heavenly “castle” where only royalty live!

Mary, however, as every one of her liturgical feasts reminds us, is a Mother. Still a Mother. Always a Mother. Our Mother. My Mother.

Mothers, by the beauty and grace of their sublime vocation, have an almost-superhuman willingness to sacrifice for the wellbeing of their children. Motherhood is the root and foundation of every other accomplishment and expertise a mother may bring to her role.

And how we need a Mother today! A woman who has been where we are. An exile. An immigrant. A widow. She who stood powerless but with faith beneath the cross as she watched her Son die. The woman who was the first disciple, listening to Jesus, lending her ear and then her heart to his bidding, translating it into action of love and obedient trust. We need this mother, teacher, and queen of the bewildered apostles who watched Jesus return to his Father and who, under his Mother’s guidance, began to find their way into the world as his ambassadors and witnesses.

This year, let’s focus on Mary who is standing next to us, each of us, the Mother we so long for. I don’t know about you, but I feel my mother next to me, even though she can no longer be physically near. It’s been said you never really get over the death of your mother, that you still need to feel her near.

This year we need our Mother more than ever. She does not remain in heaven, but comes into the lives of every one of us. Each of us has our own unique connection to her that grows through the years, shifting and changing, deepening and transforming.

If we feel confused, if we feel angry, if we feel lost, if our hearts are anxious, broken, or numb, she holds us in spirit as only she can, as only a Mother knows how to do.

We need our Mother this year, because so many around us need a mother.

A mother’s ear.

A mother’s embrace that says everything will be alright.

A mother’s patience that loves even as it allows a person the freedom to grow.

A mother’s heart that wisely offers the words, “Do whatever he tells you.”

The Assumption and the Queenship of Mary invite us all, this year, to be a part of her motherly strength and loving care for the brothers and sisters of her Son.

Soul of Mary, sanctify me.
Heart of Mary, inflame me.
Hands of Mary, support me.
Feet of Mary, direct me.
Immaculate eyes of Mary, look upon me.
Lips of Mary, speak for me.
Sorrows of Mary, strengthen me.
O Mary, hear me.
In the wound of the Heart of Jesus, hide me.
Let me never be separated from thee.
From my enemy defend me.
At the hour of my death call me,
And bid me to come to thine Immaculate Heart;
That thus I may come to the Heart of Jesus,
And there with the saints praise thee
For all eternity. Amen. 

The Raccolta

Click here for a VIDEO Adoration Guide, Entrusting Ourselves to Mary